


Toys

by Silent_So_Long



Category: Star Trek (2009)
Genre: Comedy, Crack, Gen, Humor, Silly
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-09-17
Updated: 2011-09-17
Packaged: 2017-10-23 19:59:35
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,024
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/254313
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Silent_So_Long/pseuds/Silent_So_Long
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Something very surprising happens to Kirk, Spock and McCoy after Scotty makes a mistake with the transporter room’s wiring</p>
            </blockquote>





	Toys

**Author's Note:**

> written as comment-fic for [today’s Daily Captain and Daily Doctor post](http://jim-and-bones.livejournal.com/481698.html) on the jim_and_bones community. Comm is f-locked - must be 18 or over to join and view the pretty!

Scotty was patiently waiting beside the transporter room’s controls, reading through various engineering manuals on his PADD while he did so. He’d been there for what seemed, to him, like ages, waiting for Kirk, McCoy and Spock to return to the Enterprise. They’d beamed down to the surface of Paridisi VIII for some much needed shore leave and had been gone for longer than usual, to Scotty’s mind.

Finally, his communicator beeped and Kirk’s voice filtered through - “We’re ready to board, Scotty. Energize.”

“Aye, Cap’n,” Scotty replied, dutifully, before pushing the controls and waiting for the swirls of energised atoms to deliver the trio aboard.

When Kirk, Spock and McCoy were finally standing upon the transporter platform, Scotty blinked. He couldn’t believe what he saw in front of him.

“Cap’n, are ye feeling alright, by any chance?” he asked, hesitantly, gaze firmly fixed upon the figure of one James Tiberius Kirk - “figure” being the operative word.

Kirk, as well as McCoy and Spock both, had somehow been transformed into ten inch figurines, plastic limbs held stiffly by their sides. Each were still wearing their uniforms - Kirk’s gold captain’s tunic, McCoy’s blue medical shift and Spock’s science officer tunic - albeit much smaller and only good for dolls. Despite the new plasticity of Kirk’s features, he still managed to frown at the appalled engineer, little blue eyes glittering in confusion. McCoy, however was already examining his own small, plastic hand, while Spock, beside him was maniacally trying to lift one eyebrow, with no success. The thing was painted on.

“Fascinating,” Spock said, voice much diminished now due to his much smaller height.

“What the hell is going on, dammit?” McCoy grumbled, hazel eyes turning to fix upon Kirk’s face in horror.

Kirk meanwhile, had started to laugh.

“Hey, you’re toys,” he said, pointing to McCoy and Spock with one small, plastic hand.

“So, Captain, are you,” Spock replied, calmly, despite the severity of the situation.

Kirk stopped laughing immediately upon seeing that the Vulcan was right, and was now staring at his own small hand in disbelief.

“Holy crap, I’m a toy,” he said, small voice piping up in horror.

“I’m sorry, Cap’n. I dinnae ken what happened,” Scotty said, as he knelt beside the transporter platform to stare down at the diminutive trio.

“I highly suggest you check your controls, Scotty. There must be something wrong with the wiring,” Spock said, walking forward to glare accusingly with glittering plastic brown eyes up at the engineer.

“Aye, sir, I’ll look immediately,” Scotty said, as he stood and returned to his control console.

Despite the worry in the engineer's eyes, the trio still situated on the transporter platform could see Scotty’s shoulders moving in barely repressed laughter.

“I’m glad someone’s enjoying this. Hey, look, he’s still got pointed ears,” McCoy laughed, as he walked up behind Spock and tugged on one of the Vulcan’s ears experimentally. “They don’t come off, do they?”

Spock whirled and pinched at the medical officer’s shoulder, rendering McCoy into a heap of plastic limbs upon the floor.

“Pointy eared bastard,” McCoy groaned, from the floor. “I was only looking.”

Kirk was too busy laughing to even know how to form a response to proceedings. He then tapped Spock on the shoulder and asked - “Can you still do your Vulcan salute thing, Spock?”

“I should not like to try, Jim,” Spock replied, dryly, with the barest twitch of a smile at the corners of his plastic lips.

“I’ll try, you coward,” McCoy offered, climbing to his feet before he extended both hands in front of his body.

Surprisingly, his fingers on both hands formed perfect vee’s, leaving the small doctor grinning into the Vulcan’s face.

“Hey, I’ve finally learnt how to do this thing, look,” he said, happily, as he waved both hands in front of Spock’s face.

“Interesting,” Spock replied, in the tone of voice that suggested the Vulcan thought it anything but.

Kirk had collapsed into laughter again, and almost missed Scotty’s shout from where the engineer’s head was pushed deep inside the control console.

“Alright, Jim, I think I’ve done it. Are ye ready to beam down again?” Scotty yelled, voice muffled by the enclosing circuitry around his head.

“Why?” Kirk asked, laughter now replaced by a confused frown.

Scotty attempted to retreat from the confines of the surrounding control console and cracked his head upon the side of the casing. He let fly a few choice invectives, as he rubbed at the injured spot on his forehead.

“I believe our chief engineer believes that if we beam down and up again, we will be returned to our rightful forms once more,” Spock supplied, when Scotty didn’t immediately reply. “Assuming, of course, that he’s wired it up correctly this time.”

“It’s wired properly, damn ye,” Scotty cursed at the Vulcan.

“Indeed,” Spock replied, calmly. “That, however, remains to be seen.”

“Whatever. Let’s just get this over with, shall we?” McCoy pressed. “Amusing as all this is, I don’t want to be stuck as ten inch toy for the rest of my life, thank you very much.”

“Couldn’t have said that better myself,” Kirk agreed, heartily. “Scotty, energize.”

“Aye, Cap’n,” Scotty replied, seconds before he activated the controls once more.

Kirk, Spock and McCoy disappeared for a few seconds, before Scotty beamed them back aboard once more. The engineer was thankful that this time, the trio were back to their normal shapes and sizes once more, but not quite as thankful as Kirk, McCoy and Spock themselves.

“Neither of you say anything about this to anyone, you hear?” McCoy asked, pointing at both Spock and Kirk warningly.

“Wouldn’t dream of it, doll-face,” Kirk replied, with a saucy wink at the doctor.

“Jim,” McCoy said, warningly, threatening the laughing captain with a hastily drawn hypo-spray.

“Fine, fine, no more will be said,” Kirk agreed, waving his hands in a placating gesture in front of McCoy.

Spock raised one eyebrow artfully at Scotty who merely shrugged back at him. Neither spoke; instead, Scotty watched as the Vulcan followed Kirk and McCoy from the room, voices rapidly retreating down the corridor outside.

~~ the end ~~


End file.
